Common Legal Myths About Working with an Elder Law Attorney

“We Don’t Need an Attorney, We’re Not Rich.” And Other Legal Myths Holding Families Back

I’ve lost count of how many conversations I’ve had that started with, “We probably don’t need an elder law attorney, but…”

That “but” usually comes right before someone tells me they’re managing $9,000-a-month nursing home bills, trying to figure out if Medicaid will take the family home, or wondering why the power of attorney they downloaded online isn’t being honored by the bank.

The truth is, elder law isn’t just for the ultra-wealthy, or the extremely sick, or people at the end of life. It’s for families who want clarity, control, and protection before they find themselves in legal or financial crisis.

And the number one reason families delay getting help?
Myths.
Misconceptions. Half-truths. Misinformation from friends, forums, and social media posts that make elder law seem scarier or less necessary than it really is.

So let’s clear the air.
Below are the most common legal myths about working with an elder law attorney, and what you actually need to know to protect yourself and your loved ones.

Myth #1: “Elder law is just for old people.”

This one sounds logical. After all, the word “elder” is right there in the name.

But elder law isn’t just for people in their 80s. It’s for anyone who wants to plan for long-term care, protect assets, or help an aging parent navigate complex systems like Medicaid or Veterans’ benefits.

In fact, many elder law attorneys work primarily with adult children, sons, daughters, and caregivers in their 40s to 60s, who are trying to make smart decisions on behalf of an aging loved one.

Here’s what that looks like:

A 52-year-old daughter helping her mom qualify for long-term care benefits
A 63-year-old spouse making sure his wife’s dementia diagnosis doesn’t wipe out their retirement
A 47-year-old son applying for guardianship because his father is no longer legally competent

Elder law is about advance planning and crisis management, both of which can happen well before “old age” arrives.

Myth #2: “We don’t have enough money to need an attorney.”

This one stops people in their tracks before they even make the first call.

There’s a myth that legal help is only for people with massive estates, stock portfolios, or millions to pass down. But in elder law, the people who need protection the most are often the ones with just enough to lose.

Let’s say your parent owns a modest home, has $100,000 in savings, and is facing $8,000/month in nursing home care. Without a plan, that savings could be gone in one year. Two, and the house might be next.

An elder law attorney doesn’t just help the rich preserve wealth. We help everyday families avoid unnecessary spend-down, protect the family home, and qualify for benefits without losing everything.

In many cases, what a family saves with proper planning is 5 to 10 times what they pay for legal services.

Myth #3: “If we have a will, we’re covered.”

Wills are important, but they’re not the whole story.

A will handles the distribution of your assets after death. But elder law deals with what happens while you’re still alive, especially if you become incapacitated, need long-term care, or require government benefits like Medicaid.

The more relevant documents might include:

Power of Attorney for financial and legal decisions
Healthcare Proxy or Advanced Directive for medical decisions
Revocable or Irrevocable Trusts to avoid probate or protect assets from nursing home costs
Medicaid Asset Protection Trusts to help you qualify for long-term care without losing everything

A will won’t help your family navigate Medicaid’s five-year lookback period. It won’t allow your daughter to manage your bank account if you become incapacitated. And it certainly won’t stop probate.

If your estate plan begins and ends with a will, it’s probably incomplete.

Myth #4: “We can just handle this ourselves online.”

In an era of downloadable legal forms, DIY trusts, and chatbot-generated estate plans, it’s tempting to take a shortcut. And if you’re dealing with something simple, like leaving your car to your nephew, those templates might work.

But elder law is not simple.

Medicaid rules vary by state. The five-year lookback period penalizes certain asset transfers but not others. Creating the wrong kind of trust could disqualify you from benefits. Filing the wrong kind of power of attorney could lead to a bank rejecting it at a crucial moment.

There’s no undo button on legal mistakes.

That $79 fill-in-the-blank document might seem like a bargain until it costs your family tens of thousands in lost benefits, unnecessary taxes, or missed deadlines.

Myth #5: “Medicare will cover long-term care if we need it.”

Unfortunately, this is one of the most expensive myths of all.

Medicare does not cover long-term nursing home care.

It may cover up to 100 days in a skilled nursing facility after a qualifying hospital stay, and even then, it only fully covers the first 20 days. After that, you start paying a daily co-pay until the 100 days run out.

Beyond that, you’re on your own unless you qualify for Medicaid, which is needs-based and has strict eligibility rules.

Many families only discover this after they’re hit with a $12,000 invoice. By then, options are limited.

An elder law attorney can help you plan for long-term care, legally restructure assets, and get you on a path to qualify for Medicaid without losing everything first.

Myth #6: “We don’t need to worry about this until there’s a crisis.”

Waiting for a crisis to get your legal house in order is like trying to buy fire insurance while your house is burning.

Yes, elder law attorneys can help during a crisis, when someone is suddenly hospitalized, diagnosed with dementia, or facing long-term care placement.

But crisis planning is harder. It’s more expensive. And your options are more limited.

Planning ahead means:

More assets can be protected
Family conflict is minimized
Medical wishes are clearly documented
Transitions happen with less stress and fear

The best time to talk to an elder law attorney? Before you need one. The second-best time is right now.

Myth #7: “All attorneys can help with elder law stuff.”

Elder law is its own specialty. Just like you wouldn’t go to a foot doctor for heart surgery, you don’t want a general practitioner handling your long-term care planning.

Qualified elder law attorneys understand the intricate rules around Medicaid, VA benefits, guardianship, and asset protection. They stay up to date with changing state laws. They often work alongside social workers, healthcare providers, and financial planners.

A real elder law attorney will help you:

Strategically structure your finances to qualify for benefits
Set up trusts to avoid probate or preserve eligibility
Draft documents that hold up under legal and medical scrutiny
Guide your family through transitions and crises with compassion and clarity

So yes, it matters who you choose.

Myth #8: “Hiring an elder law attorney is too expensive.”

This is one of the most common myths and one of the most easily disproven.

Let’s break it down.

Hiring an elder law attorney might cost $3,000 to $8,000 depending on your state, the complexity of your needs, and whether you’re planning or in crisis.

But without that help?

Nursing homes can cost $100,000–$150,000 per year
A missed Medicaid opportunity could cost your entire savings
An invalid power of attorney could require a guardianship proceeding that costs $10,000 or more
Probate fees alone can eat up 3–7% of your estate

Not hiring an elder law attorney can be far more expensive.

Think of it this way: you’re not paying for forms. You’re paying for protection, peace of mind, and access to benefits and resources you might not even know exist.

Myth #9: “My kids will take care of everything when the time comes.”

Many people assume their children will handle things when the time comes. And most kids are willing to help. But that doesn’t mean they’re legally allowed to.

Without proper documents in place, your adult child can’t:

Access your bank accounts
Talk to your doctors
Make decisions if you become incapacitated
Sell your house if needed for care costs

They may have the best intentions, but without legal authority, their hands are tied.

Even worse, if siblings disagree or if a power of attorney is challenged, it can cause deep family rifts or even court involvement.

The most loving thing you can do is put a plan in place before you expect them to step in.

Myth #10: “Talking about this stuff is too depressing.”

Planning for aging, illness, or death is uncomfortable. No one likes thinking about the “what ifs.”

But what’s really depressing is watching a family struggle, argue, and drain their savings because no one talked about it in time.

This isn’t about dwelling on worst-case scenarios. It’s about making sure your family knows your wishes, your assets are protected, and your legacy is preserved.

When done right, elder law planning isn’t morbid. It’s empowering.

It says, “I’m taking care of things now, so my family doesn’t have to suffer later.”

Don’t Let Myths Lead to Mistakes

Elder law isn’t just about getting documents signed. It’s about protecting your choices, your assets, and your peace of mind before a health crisis or legal emergency forces your hand.

The myths we believe today become the problems our families face tomorrow.

So if any of these myths sound familiar, if you’ve been putting off planning, assuming you’re “not old enough,” or worried that hiring an attorney is too expensive, let this be your wake-up call.

The best time to get clear on your options is before things go sideways. The second-best time? Right now. Contact us at Hackard Law to protect your loved ones, your assets, and your peace of mind.